My husband said one of the most romantic things I’ve ever heard from him during a heavy conversation between us.
It was near midnight, and we were both lying in bed in our dark bedroom, not yet asleep. We were talking and somewhat arguing about a topic between us.
The kids had long been in bed and we had our time to talk.
We were contemplating a decision, a big one for our family. One that was personal to me.
And we both disagreed on it, having different opinions. Both strong opinions.
I could feel the strain in our voices, as we continued our conversation.
I didnt want to give in as I had been carrying this weight , and he felt the pressure from me.
Then he said something that has stuck with me to this day.
“Because I love you more than I love me, I am agreeing to give you what you want.”
Later, he turned away to face his side of the bed, and that was the sign of the end of our conversation.
He had conceded to me, because he didnt want me to be unhappy, even though he still did not agree to the decision that was made.
And I knew he loved me, and loves me a lot. Times like this, despite the heated conversation, reminded me of it.
It pained me to hear it, but at the same time, I felt relief.
Pain because I didnt want him to be burdened and hurt by my selfishness, relief because he agreed to what I wanted.
It was a complicated situation, and we had been back and forth on it for quite a long time. Tonight we had another round of discussion on it.
My husband had said a few times in the past that he felt that he loved me more than I did him. In fact he does go out of his way to care for me, even when it inconveniences him.
And I knew that of all the people in my life that I had any relationship with, be it family or friends, I took him for granted the most, because I knew I can depend on him and he would still care for me.
That makes me sound really selfish, and at times it is true, so I’ve been working towards showing him love more in the language he knows best, which is via acts of service, within our family and home where work and responsibilities were never-ending with three kids, work, and a home to upkeep, mixed into our day-to-day.
But pained as it may be, his telling me those words that night and following through with it, made me feel special and loved, by him.
And I told myself to give him back this love as much as I can in our relationship, and to work on our marriage.
I am thankful, to say the least, to have him as a husband.