I like my job.
It ticks the box of career fulfillment and provides an avenue for me to develop my potential.
But it comes with challenges that tarnish the whole experience for me, and I believe for most people, work may not be an ideal situation.
I’m an engineer, specifically a material engineer in the semiconductor field of work. I work in a European-based company. This is to give some perspective on where I’m coming from.
After my university graduation, I quickly applied for work and was employed 2 months after my convocation. My first job was in a smaller company compared to where I work now, but it was there that I built up my knowledge in the materials and manufacturing field, and it was due to this that I was eventually headhunted and hired to join the current company I’m in now.
I worked diligently, making sure work was done well and I get my satisfaction from seeing progress and solving issues.
As my career progressed, so did my job complexity, not only in the technical area, but also with the type of colleagues and people I had to work with.
Managing relational topics was not my area of expertise, in fact, I always thought of myself as an extreme introvert in my earlier days, I figured that I would work in a lab somewhere, having minimal interaction with others. But this was not the path I eventually took.
Turns out, visibility was key in a big company, and naturally, as I got more involved in bigger topics and projects, I had to learn how to work with and sometimes lead larger teams.
Soft skills, communication, and sometimes negotiation abilities became useful. I had to learn those.
I managed, and thankfully with supportive bosses, I did relatively well.
Then earlier last year my scope widened, another career progression opportunity came my way. With it, I was exposed to a larger base of engineers from different departments, those whom I’ve not worked with before.
Then came office politics, infighting between the engineering departments, and friction.
It became clear that technical capability alone was not enough to get things resolved the right way.
Work became more complicated and I too had to grow through it, now having a team of my own to manage.
Although I enjoyed the learning curve, it was definitely not easy, my anxiety levels rose due to work topics, and I was working late nights more frequently.
Work did stabilize over time, after my own capacity had grown to accommodate the new environment I was in, and after certain topics were de-escalated.
I learned how things worked in the organization, how to manage different abrasive personalities, and expanded my mental, and emotional capacities along the way.
However, the momentum and the nature of the work remained.
Eventually, I found myself thinking of moving away from the heat of operations in manufacturing, and going to other engineering departments where there were less politics, with less ‘fire-fighting’ scenarios, and that focused more on technical development for new products.
The money was good where I was, but was it good enough for me to stay for another 5 years or so?
My mind also wandered to thoughts of having an alternative career, outside of a corporate job that I had know for the past 13 years?
I had harbored thoughts of opening a learning center for children, or maybe as a writer on the side. The income would be lower and not as stable.
By now I had a family, three kids to care for, and a husband, who was also working.
What are the options?
I realized I had to have a potential exit strategy and put it up as a backup plan for if and when I reached my boiling point or had enough of the type of mental strain that comes with my current job scope.
Money was a factor, other than financial security, the dual income we had fueled our lifestyle.
But here is the key point.
We needed enough money so that work was not the end-all and be-all for a fulfilling and secure life.
Did we have enough income, that I can quit, or get another job with a lower paycheck?
Enough finances so that work will become an option and not a necessity.
The thought of that concept in itself relieved a lot of pressure and stress off my mind.
Because it meant that I had options, and I was not going to be stuck in a job, that I might dread.
So I’m working to reach that milestone, and we are on our way.
I had started on my financial independence journey after my second child was born 6 years ago, and had been working toward reducing our household debts.
We had paid off the house, the car, and student loans, and did not intend to take on anymore new loans anytime soon. We had one more property loan left. We had a lot more ways to go, before I was comfortable to think of leaving.
But I did not intend to leave my job anytime soon, I just needed the ‘option’ to be open for me, and one that comes to mind on those stressful days when work becomes a burden.
In fact, having that idea always at the back of my mind, made working more meaningful and tolerable, knowing that I did not need to work for money, but for the other aspects of the job that still remained enjoyable.
The progress of our work, and the achievements of my colleagues and I became more motivating when the thought that monetary income was not the only reason I showed up at work.
At the end of the day, work is just one part of my life.
The wholeness of my life is full and driven by my family, my faith, health, spirituality, and love.
It’s part of a path, a journey in lide, and what matters most remains clear.
If you have anxiety about work, maybe you can consider taking this approach as well.