Skip to content

We Didn’t Celebrate Valentines This Year, But I Felt Loved

Due to circumstances, my husband and I were not able to celebrate valentines together this year.

In fact, the thought of valentines had completely passed my mind, and only on the 14th of February itself did I realize the event.

We were on a short beach holiday with friends, along with our three kids who were aged 7 years old and below.

The 5 of us bunked together as a family in a room and slept on a king-size bed for 2 nights, in a seaside resort shared with our friends. It was fun, chaotic, and full of food. Valentine’s day happened to fall on the second day of our trip, and we spent it with others instead of having a romantic day just the two of us.

Nevertheless, this valentine’s day I felt loved and I didn’t feel that I lacked anything.

We had just bathed the kids after coming back from the water theme park at our resort, going down water slide after slide, and slightly sunburnt despite our sunscreen’s best efforts. We were tired out by mid-afternoon and were busy bathing the kids and then trying to put them down for their nap.

I was feeling particularly insecure that day, it’s one of my personal struggles I deal with even up till my thirties, and I had activated my ‘auto mode’ whereby I functioned by turning off these feelings of self-doubt running around inside.

It was my coping mechanism, intentional apathy towards myself. Sometimes it works well, and on some days it didn’t work as well as I intended it to.

This was one of those days.

Back to the present, my husband drew the curtains close and got into bed with the kids to get them to sleep. I then took a quick shower, answered a work call in the bathroom, and quietly stepped out into the dark room to avoid waking the now-sleeping kids.

I squeezed myself under the thick hotel blankets next to my husband, there was just enough space for my small frame to fit on the edge without fear of rolling off the bed.

I wanted a nap, my mind and body were tired. I turned to face the outside of our bed and closed my eyes.

Suddenly I felt my husband’s arm over my body, pulling me closer to him.

He hugged me from behind with both arms.

I had assumed he was sleeping.

With his eyes still closed, he whispered to my ears that he loved me.

I felt warm inside, comforted, and loved.

It was just what I needed to calm myself down.

The fact that he was there, holding the fort together with me while taking care of the kids, and loving me just the way I am.

His actions, acts of service, and words were enough.

This was worth more than a bouquet of roses or an expensive meal, and it was the best valentines gift for me.

My feelings of insecurity subsided, at least temporarily, and I pulled him close and shut my eyes.

On a king-size bed with my husband and three young sleeping kids, taking an afternoon nap together, was exactly where I wanted to be on this year’s valentines day.


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *